воскресенье, 19 октября 2008 г.

failed to open the connection




So life has been good to me the last two days.

Last night I hung out with Gracie and Sasha. We went to Voodoo and I FINALLY got my Maple-Bacon bar. LORD�it was good Iapos;d been craving one for over a month, but never had the time to go over there.

I went to the Apple store today to figure out what was wrong with my iPod, and after about five minutes I walked out of the store with a brand new shiny iPod I am SUPER excited, because mine was two years old and had more than a few scratches. I now know though that you donapos;t want to�wrap your headphone cord around the iPod when itapos;s plugged in. Apparently�that is why mine broke, but the guy said since he couldnapos;t prove that he was just going to give me a new one.

After the Apple store, my parents took me to the grocery�store and I got some food�stuffs Sweetness Iapos;m happy I can actually make�myself something to eat now...HAHA Then�we went to the Old Spaghetti Factory for lunch. Yum

�Anyways, I hope the next few days are just as good

^_^
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Brooke had gotten to the gym early, decking the place out in blue and gold balloons and streamers just for that extra school spirit feel, and setting up the rest of the place. There were plenty of moddable snacks set up on tables, and breakfast set to be delivered in the morning, and sheapos;d stored extra sleeping bags, pillows and blankets against the wall for people to take if they needed some. And because Brooke was Brooke, there were some extra things set up for people to enjoy, because you couldnapos;t just leave it at that.

Once she was finished, she headed to her room long enough to get ready, then came back down to the gym in her best Clothes Over Broapos;s pajamas to get the party started.


[Open to everyone, though wait for the OCD or I will find you.]

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суббота, 18 октября 2008 г.

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So many people I know, see everything in Black and White,
They listen, but it always seems to come out the same way: Black and White.
"All or nothing" I hear them say, even though the words never leave their mouth.
"All or nothing" seems so cruel, itapos;s not fair,
At the same time, what is fair?
I have no reason to place blame, but itapos;s hard to live with the gray,
I donapos;t want to, and I donapos;t have to,
But the world seems so much more colorful,
In Black and White.

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Well Well Well
Hello, yaapos;ll
Guess what?
DRAMA
:] yes, that fuckinapos; cutthroat bitch, Drama.
I hate it.
do you?
I always seem to have one person in my life that I love except they do one thing that just...makes me so angry with them: They either cause drama or they repeat a drama.
And of course they do this everyday.
In the beginning all is fine.
Then they bitch and complain a little more each day
then BOOM
YOU�WANT�TO�YELL�AT�THEM�TO�DO�SOMETHING�ABOUT�IT
Iapos;m glad the friend I was talking about IS�DOING�SOMETHING�ABOUT�IT. Haha for the last few days sheapos;s been whining about the same damn person. I mean I do that with Kayla, but I canapos;t lash out and tell her off, sheapos;s my sister and I only see her around my parents so I canapos;t.
I feel kinda sorry for Becca.
First, She was caught as the other woman with Ramiro who was dating Sam. And Sam found out.
Then this shit thatapos;s going with her and Nicole.
Ah shit I still need me CDs and the brownie mix from Ty and I still have his shit.

I spent the night at Tayapos;s on Thursday
Then she spent the night here on Friday
Last night, she, ty, and Christina all went and pranked someoneapos;s yard
At first it was going to Amandaapos;s
but alas the fuckinapos; idiot was awake lol.
And so they did Montanaapos;s yard
and nearly got caught :]
Those lovable idiots
lol Me, I got to stay back and watch the stuff they didnapos;t use lol read An Abundance of Katherines by John green


Um anyway the story Iapos;m going to work on soon.
lmfao Forks Marching Utensils
:] Tyler is making an imaginary Marching Band for FORKS yapos;know. STEPHANIE�MEYERapos;s TWILIGHTapos;S�FORKS�:]
yeah Iapos;m the one that made up the utensils :]
My vein hurts :/
The stupid nurse did somethin I swear.
I had my hand clenched, holdinapos; my daddyapos;s hand with my other hand and she wrapped the rubber thingy around my arm and took my blood. Very painfully :[ and then when she undid the rubber, IDK�WHAT�THE�FUCK�HAPPENED�but damn it was like the elastic fuckinapos; snapped against a vein near the vein she was drawing from because the vein instantly was sensitive and hurting like fuck. My skin above it is still fuckinapos; sensitive. It hurts badly :[ Um also Iapos;m getting up there for Diabetes because of it being on both sides of my family and Iapos;m overweight and yadda yadda. :[ Thing is though, I donapos;t want to learn bout my health. This is one subject I have no clue why but my brain will not learn. I blantly refuse to learn it for some reason. I want to stay ignorant on my health. I think itapos;s because of this recent thing with Grandpa. Iapos;m dead serious when I say even when I was trying to understand what the doctor was saying my brain just idk I wasnapos;t getting any of it. I canapos;t remember what happened at all. Itapos;s like Iapos;m seeing the footage but thereapos;s no audio. Or little mumbles. When I think back on it. :[ Iapos;m sure I came off like I could careless but the truth is Im scared shitless and I guess I donapos;t care whether or not I die young or something. IDK :/ it just really sucks
But BACK�THE�STORY
Once I finish Chapter One Iapos;ll post it.
That is when I go back several times and make everything flow better and just generally sound better.
:] I guess

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пятница, 17 октября 2008 г.

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I�wish I�had more time.
I wish my character hadnapos;t died in the Sims.
I�wish I�wasnapos;t so young.
I wish I didnapos;t feel so old.
I�wish I�could have a lavish wedding.
I�wish I could travel the world.
I�wish school wasnapos;t so hard.
I wish I�didnapos;t have so much homework.
I wish I�werenapos;t so lonely.
I wish I�was skinny.
I wish I was pretty.
I wish I�didnapos;t have so much laundry.
I�wish my feet werenapos;t so big.
I�wish my computer could be reformatted.
I�wish I�had a new digital camera.
I�wish I�had my own microprocessor.
I wish I had more money.
I�wish I�could afford life.
I�wish people would like me.
I wish I�werenapos;t a bitch.
I�wish I could take psychology classes.
I�wish I�had time to do art.
I�wish I�didnapos;t complain so much.
I wish I�had an iPod.
I�wish I�didnapos;t have ADD.
I�wish I�didnapos;t have bipolar disorder.
I�wish bipolar medication didnapos;t make me feel so shitty.
I�wish people would listen to me.
I�wish I�had more clothes.
I�wish I�had more shoes.
I wish I�had a different purse.
I�wish I�was healthier.
I�wish I�could sleep in my dorm.
I wish my hair would do what itapos;s supposed to.
I�wish my nails wouldnapos;t break.
I wish I�felt appreciated.
I wish I�felt needed.
I�wish my scars would disappear.
I wish I�was smaller.
I wish I�could run away.
I�wish I�could disappear.
I wish people would notice me.
I�wish it was always autumn.
I�wish I�could spend more time with Dan.
I�wish I�could spend more time with my family.
I wish I could spend more time with my friends.
I�wish I�hadnapos;t lost touch with so many people.
I�wish I�could take a vacation.
I�wish I had a new job.
I�wish I�wasnapos;t so lazy.
I�wish I�exercised more.
I�wish I�had more motivation.
I�wsih I�could fast forward life.
I�wish I�could pause time.
I�wish I�could feel alive.

I�wish I�wasnapos;t such a failure.



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четверг, 16 октября 2008 г.

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Perhaps itapos;s time I just blog with more words other than uploading pictures and let them do the talking.
Raya have been great, no doubt. Itapos;s always awesome. The most awesome part of raya is when you get green packets with money (min. $2) inside. Yes, minimum is $2. Something which was far below awesome was, exams. Exams during raya, not a fun thing. Instead of going to peoplesapos; house, collecting money, I am to sit at home and rot. Itapos;s not like as if I studied or something.
Speaking of exams, Iapos;ve got back some of my papers. What came to my surprise was, when I first got back my Paper 1, i only got 29 out of 50. Never got that before. I would at least get 35 marks, or higher. Dissapointed of course. But, what made me happy was when I got back my paper 2. I thought i would get like 30+ considering that I only scored 29 for my paper 1. But boy was I wrong, I got 45 for Paper 2 which I claimed was difficult than Paper 1. It made me screamed like hell when I saw that mark. Yes, surprised Like what Lydia said: People like me(good in math, sungguh bangge), could only score those hard type of questions and not the easy ones. I do tend to make a lot of careless mistakes for the easy-type of questions. Itapos;s because I cramped all the formulas in my head. But somehow, I couldnapos;t remember the volume of cone when I was doing the question, in this case, for only paper 1.
Iapos;m done with math; now History, English, Literature, Art and Geography.
I failed History, as usual 33. I passed english. I passed both papers; 1 2. But, paper 1 helped me most and my Summary helped me pull up my paper 2apos;s marks. Thank
While the rest of my classmates got back their result for Lit, Art and Geog, I was at home, sleeping happily. Yes, I gave school a miss today. From what Azylla told me, I failed Geo (not knowing my marks) and passed my Lit but not itapos;s overall. And obviously, I will fail my art. Why? Simply because I did my prep work during the paper itself. Instead of drawing, I wrote. Cool huh? Definitely wonapos;t score Tomorrowapos;s Adda birthday. Or shall I say, in a few hours time?



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среда, 15 октября 2008 г.

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Truly nothing has really happened today...I woke up way early...I drove to school...schooled...and drove home...Iapos;m shocked at how fast Iapos;ve fallen into a routine...I miss spontaneity...

There were a few things that happened today I guess...I cooked in home economics...I researched some crappy artist in art...basically lessons suck big mega time and are all full of super epic FAIL

Monique is still hating me for something I haveapos;nt done wrong, seriously she is insane, I haveapos;nt done anything and she still has a go at me under her breath and walks away any time I do anything...itapos;s so freaking annoying, seriously if she keeps this up I will seriously curse her into oblivion (I can do that...I have ways of making things happen�*shifty eyes*)

Haha I woke up at 4am for no reason whatsoever it was so weird, and I was so tired I could hear my msn going off and I didapos;nt even have the willpower to rollover and type "sorry, need sleep".

Ashey has been kinda down lately...and for some reason I think itapos;s my fault...but seriously I miss his happiness...because it made me happy, and I am happy, but it seems the happier I am the more miserable and unlucky he gets...maybe I should let myself slip back into the cold�embrace of depression... But he seriously has been miserable...no sleep...all his possesions seem to be breaking or going missing...and he was badgered by the tram police (LOSERS) for losing his ticket...�but he was so upset...and I so badly wanted to hold him, and remind him how loved and special he is...and tell him he isnapos;t scum...but all I could do was go to school as he rolled over to sleep...Iapos;m so worried about him...

Iapos;m feeling kinda blue so Iapos;m gonna stop here.

Luv for everyone, but Love for Ashey...xoxo

Peace out



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воскресенье, 12 октября 2008 г.

fireplace grate heat




A busy day today (well, Saturday). I spent much of it in Walnut Creek, because Alex had invited me and a few other folks over there for some gaming ... But I made a day of it.



Biking. Iapos;ve been jealously looking at maps showing bike trails over the hills in Walnut Creek and nearby towns, so I headed over the hill an hour or an hour and a half early, with the idea of getting off the BART train at Lafayette, and then riding a bike trail the 3.5 miles or so to Walnut Creek.

The catch: what I thought was a bike trail was actually a creek. Mind you, this isnapos;t as stupid as it sounds, because Iapos;d been looking at another trail (the Iron Horse Trail) that runs right along a creek, so when I was flipping between the bike trail maps and the Google Maps, and I saw the Iron Horse Trail marked (or rather, the creek next to it marked), I thought that Iapos;d found a new symbol for bike trail. Sigh.

Not a biggie, there actually was a bike trail another block or two on (the Lafayette-Morago Trail) and beyond that bike lanes pretty much all the way to Alexapos;s house. In fact, lots of people were biking. Alex says that people train for cross-country riding over there because there is lots of straight, flat land. And, hey, if those were people training, I did a pretty good job of keeping up (Or, at least, falling slowly behind.)

Once I got to Walnut Creek, I headed past the downtown, and also checked out the Iron Horse Trail, itself which runs from Concord to Dublin or so. It was OK. The "creek" it runs next to is actually a culvert, and so it wasnapos;t a very pretty trail, but Iapos;d like to ride it sometime.

Overall, not as long as some of my recent rides, but a pleasant diversion.



Over the Hills. I actually quite enjoyed being over the hills. It straddles the line between suburban and rural as you ride from Lafayette to Walnut Creek, and as such it reminds me of the San Jose that I grew up in, with dry, brown hills, the foliage typical of California, and habitation that hasnapos;t yet taken over the area. I donapos;t see that in the much more urbanized East Bay, so it was sort of like coming home.

The weather was nice over there today. I was actually surprised that it was very windy (just like it was on this side of the hills). I was pleased it wasnapos;t hot. I wouldnapos;t want to be over there in the summer, but today was a great day for riding in that area.

And as for Walnut Creek, when I got to the more urban downtown: it just screams of affluence. It looks like the whole town came of out a ritzy catalog. Itapos;s attractive, and I wouldnapos;t mind visiting there, but the whole place was certainly shut down by the time I left (around 11.30); contrariwise when I got back to Berkeley, there was still the occasional place that was hopping.



Gaming. Only a little to say about the gaming, though I played an impressive four games that Iapos;d never played before.

Roborally Iapos;d long wanted to try this and I wasnapos;t disappointed. Programming games are cool, even when you get totally hosed (which I did).

Zauber Cocktail was a weird trading game, like Pit was some more shiny bits. I like Pit, so I liked this one too.

Turfmaster was an enjoyable horse racing game with very interesting strategic decisions, particularly in the fact that you canapos;t go as fast if youapos;re in first place (a pretty common tactical* point in racing games). We played a game of three rounds, and I came in first three times, so clearly I can never play this game again.

Galaxy Trucker was last up, where you race a timer to build a ship that (hopefully) wonapos;t be destroyed by random events. Also a lot of fun. I liked the creativity of putting a ship together. Eric called it Factory Fun but fun. Actually, I enjoyed Factory Fun, but Iapos;d call this Factory Fun but funner.

It was all good, and overall a good day. Iapos;m glad Iapos;ve been feeling better to enjoy this sort of thing; though I still have weird aches, headaches, and sinus pressure, per my illness of the last three months, Iapos;m increasingly certain theyapos;re lessening and thus Iapos;ve been able to do more things.



* Yes, Mr. McCain, I do mean tactical, not strategic, and yes I do know what those mean; you do not.

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I bought stuff today :D (Actually, this should probably be D: but at least I got paid on Friday? Um. XD;) I got two shirts (because Jacksonville has a Deliaapos;s~) and new shoes (theyapos;re green) and Foundation (even though stupid Borders didnapos;t have it so we had to go to Barnes Noble) and new star-shaped hair clips (because my old ones broke and I was very sad). And a Christmas present for my mom, because it was too perfect not to get. So I suppose it wasnapos;t really that much stuff? XD; I really love one of the shirts I got at Deliaapos;s though, it has R2-D2 on it all labeled in Japanese. XD Plus, thereapos;s nothing for your self-image like being able to wear an XS? [/dumb]

BUT now I am tired. ._. Probably because I actually got up early but had to finish reading Thaw so I was up until three. XD; (And then I kept waking up this morning with paragraphs of a sequel in my head that I donapos;t dare write because that would eat my life, too, and if she already has one written then I will just sit on pins and needles until IT CAN BE PUBLISHED PLZ?) But I will try to go to bed earlier tonight, provided I donapos;t just fall over or something. Iapos;m kind of hungry, but we had a late lunch, and I have no milk... (Not that the last part is so relevant, I guess. :D;)

Oh, and I got Kevin a birthday card. I better stick that in the mail. Geez, everybody has a birthday next week, seriously. XD There are FOUR of you guys. Itapos;s a conspiracy

That is all. :D;

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